Monday, October 30, 2017

Smile, It’s Monday: Your Weekly Wake-up Call to Become a More Effective Leader

The ‘Golden Rule’ is ‘Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.’ 
Instead, I believe we should do unto others as they would
have others do unto them—as long as it's aligned with our values.
--- Anthony Silard

When we follow the ‘Golden Rule’, we project our values onto others and often give them what we—rather than they—desire.

The alternative—expressing genuine empathy—can be challenging.

Do you spend a lot of your work day listening to others? Do you sometimes feel frustrated that your efforts do not seem to be reciprocated? Does it sometimes feel like others think, “She or he is doing OK. I don’t need to be there for them.”

If you are in a leadership role, you are not alone. As it turns out, leaders are in a particularly vulnerable position when it comes to empathy.

According to an empirical study by Ginka Toegel of IMD Business School in Switzerland, the empathy leaders express toward their followers tends to go unreciprocated.

Why? While leaders view their expressions of empathy toward their followers as “extra-role behavior”—in other words, not a part of their job description—followers hold a contrary view. They consider leader empathy to be a part of the leader’s job description, or “in-role behavior.”

“The leader is acting like they care about my personal and professional issues,” followers tend to think, “because they know that’s the best way to motivate me to perform better.”

The sad thing is that, at least on some level, followers are correct.

This week, consider joining a peer group of other leaders where your empathy will be reciprocated and you can receive the social support you need to be an effective leader.
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Anthony Silard is the president of The Global Leadership Institute and the author of the Simon & Schuster book The Connection: Link Your Passion, Purpose, and Actions to Make a Difference in the World. To receive Smile, It's Monday every other week in your inbox and a free copy of Anthony's new audio CD, "The Surprising Source of Your Passion", enter your email here (1-step only).

Monday, October 2, 2017

Smile, It’s Monday: Your Weekly Wake-up Call to Live the Life You Have Imagined

If you keep doin’ what you been doin’, 
you’ll keep gettin’ what you been gettin’.
--- Yogi Berra

Like all other human beings, you develop habitual patterns you’re comfortable with and continually act them out.

When we succumb to the unconscious control of our habitual patterns, we think we are experiencing each day, but in reality we’re only projecting our past experience repeatedly onto the present.

We’re not living 365 days each year, but one day 365 times.

Recall a time when you made a significant life change. Did you think through the new course of action for months or years, or did it come about after an unforeseen event changed the way you view your life?

If you finally decided to take a risk and become vulnerable in a relationship, was it attributable to months of self-analysis or did this emotional breakthrough follow your meeting someone who made you feel both safe and inspired enough to love again?

If you made a career change, what pushed you over the edge to let go of the familiar and leap into the unknown? Was it months of self-introspection, or a rupture in a key office relationship, or both?

While your thoughts “set the stage” for a significant life change, a strong move by one of the actors is often necessary for it to come to fruition.

This week, put your mind on hold and take a daring step toward an important life goal.
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Anthony Silard is the president of The Global Leadership Institute and the author of the Simon & Schuster book The Connection: Link Your Passion, Purpose, and Actions to Make a Difference in the World. To receive Smile, It's Monday every other week in your inbox and a free copy of Anthony's new audio CD, "The Surprising Source of Your Passion", enter your email here (1-step only).