Monday, November 20, 2017

Smile, It’s Monday: Your Weekly Wake-up Call to Become Your Greatest Fan

To a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
--- Old proverb

In July 2004, the City Council of Monza, a small town in Italy, banned goldfish bowls. They felt strongly that goldfish should be kept in rectangular aquariums rather than in round bowls.

Search your imagination and try to figure out why they made this decision. I have to admit I was stumped on this one.

A statement from the City Council read: “A fish kept in a bowl has a distorted view of reality and suffers because of this.”

In other words, Monza city council members want goldfish, even if they are to live out their days in a glass encasing, to see the world as it truly is.

Have you ever been feeling sad and thought everyone else must also feel sad? Alternatively, have you ever been looking to rent a house or apartment and suddenly realized there are ‘For Rent’ signs everywhere, even though you walked by them unknowingly before?

We don’t see others, but ourselves projected onto others.

Rather than creating our life, we inherit a series of habitual patterns from our parents and others who have significantly influenced us. These habitual patterns, rather than what lies directly in front of us, determine what we see.

This week, identify the lens you cover your eyes with that distorts your view of reality and detracts from the way you experience life.

As the citizens of Monza have taught us, if you wish to liberate yourself from its control you first have to name it.
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Anthony Silard is the president of The Global Leadership Institute and the author of the Simon & Schuster book The Connection: Link Your Passion, Purpose, and Actions to Make a Difference in the World. To receive Smile, It's Monday every other week in your inbox and a free copy of Anthony's new audio CD, "The Surprising Source of Your Passion", enter your email here (1-step only).

Monday, November 6, 2017

Smile, It’s Monday: Your Weekly Wake-up Call to Build Meaningful Relationships

On the last analysis, then, love is life.
Love never faileth and life never faileth so long as there is love.
--- Henry Drummond

There are times in our lives when our emotions can paralyze us.

Perhaps the emotion you feel is grief for a family member that has recently passed. Remind yourself that you only feel this devastated because you loved this person so deeply.

It is important to remember that the person you’ve lost would not want you to be consumed with such pain. They would want you to live rather than merely exist in this way.

You are doing them no favors by using them as a pretext to become paralyzed and to discard the valuable days of life that remain.

If working through your grief and still being a happy person is a goal for you—and I hope it is—just like any other goal or result you want in your life, you will only attain it by letting it go and focusing on the process.

The process is to continually acknowledge as much of the grief as you can manage.

When you feel you are saturated for the time being and will lose your balance if you internalize any more, it’s time to engage in another activity.

You will know when you are feeling balanced and stable enough to work through more of your sorrow.

Just as your work efforts are punctuated by periodic breaks to renew your energy so you do not become miserable and unproductive, you can approach your grief in the same way—alternately engaging with and detaching from it until it gradually becomes more manageable.
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Anthony Silard is the president of The Global Leadership Institute and the author of the Simon & Schuster book The Connection: Link Your Passion, Purpose, and Actions to Make a Difference in the World. To receive Smile, It's Monday every other week in your inbox and a free copy of Anthony's new audio CD, "The Surprising Source of Your Passion", enter your email here (1-step only).